On Edge
January 1, 1970
The symptoms of pressure and impatience are all around us. Too many of us are living on edge. As parents we often lose our tempers and jump at our children and say things we didn’t intent to say. Sometimes when we are in an easy mood, even their serious mistakes may not be noticed. But if we are on edge, even their normal activities may bring impatience and penalties. Too often our discipline is prompted more by how we feel than by what they do. It isn’t that the youngsters don’t deserve discipline. It wouldn’t be good for them if they weren’t corrected when correction is called for. They must expect to pay some penalty for their mistakes. But they shouldn’t have to pay for ours also. They shouldn’t have to pay an extra penalty because our nerves are on edge, any more then a defendant in court should have to pay for something that didn’t agree with the judge. There is another factor in this equation – that of example: If we, as adults, flare up when the occasion doesn’t call for it, how can we correct children when they flare up at others? If we are too quick to criticize, how can we teach them that they shouldn’t be critical, touchy, and quick-tempered? But when you have had a problem with one of your children, when you have said some things you didn’t intend to say and were more severe than the situation called for, have you ever gone back and looked at that same youngster when he was asleep, and felt terribly humble and terribly small? And, with a little extra moisture in your eyes, have you ever uttered a grateful prayer that you had him, and prayed for strength and patience to be the kind of parent you ought to be? These mellowing moods are good for the soul. And if we would remember them when we are tempted to speak too sharply or to judge too quickly or to act too hastily, we could save ourselves many apologies and much repentance and could have more influence with our families and friends, and our words would have more weight.