How to Behave Away From Home

April 16, 1950

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Sometimes people suppose that there is a different code of conduct away from home, and that they can count on not being known. This might be true in fiction, but it isn’t true in fact. In fiction and in fairy tale a favorite plot is for the prince to move among his people in disguise. Such plots have a host of variations in a long line of literature, and it makes exciting reading when the pauper proves to be the prince or when the grand lady changes places with her maid.

In fiction such situations appear to be easily possible, but in life we cannot count on not being known. Fugitives have often found this out. Sometimes they go to the ends of the earth; but sooner or later, almost surely, someone discovers their identity. Gambling on not being known isn’t a very good gamble.

Often people are surprised at meeting friends in far places. But seasoned travelers learn never to be surprised at meeting almost anyone almost anywhere. We may think to lose ourselves in the big city, but, trite as it may seem to say so, it is a small world. And if we engage in unbecoming conduct a thousand miles away, the news will likely get back sooner than we will. Those who let down their standards away from home often learn this and often have cause to be very much embarrassed.

But this isn’t the only reason for behaving ourselves well away from home. We ought to have enough common sense and courage and character to do it anyway. Our principles and self-respect should give us reason enough to conduct ourselves in the highest code and character no matter where we are. Personal principles shouldn’t shift with geography.

But even if there were no question of principle and no question of conscience, it would still be well to remember that we just can’t be sure that we won’t be seen by someone whom we shall sometime see again. It isn’t ever safe to suppose that the news won’t get back. Our record and reputation travel with us. More than that, they often precede us, and show up almost anywhere.

At home or away from home, we cannot rely on not being known. Furthermore, there is no reason why we should because good conduct and good character are matters of principle, and not merely matters of whether or not we are known. Our identity is indelible so is what we are no matter where we are.

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