Harboring Our Hurts

No doubt the course of history has many times been altered because someone has had his feelings hurt. There are some classic examples that suggest themselves, such as Achilles sulking in his tent at the siege of Troy. But for every such that has been publicly cited, there are millions more where the lives of people have been altered because someone has had hurt feeling. Sometimes the consequences of hurt feelings have been exceedingly serious, far out of proportion to the offense, as men have stubbornly misunderstood one another, and families and others have fought and feuded (like Shakespeare’s Capulets and Montagues) and the lives of the innocent have been blighted (like Romeo and Juliet), and irreparable damage has been done – because someone has had his pride offended or his feelings hurt. It is true that people are often thoughtless; often inconsiderate, blunt, and often deal with others the wrong way. But so long as we live with imperfect people, we are sometimes going to have our feelings hurt, even when others don’t know they have hurt us, and we are sometimes going to hurt others, whether we know it or not. There likely isn’t one of us who hasn’t been hurt or who hasn’t hurt others. If too easily we assume a martyr’s role, if we magnify our hurts, if we withdraw ourselves from fellowship, from association with others, and brood and sulk too long in our tents, we do serious damage to ourselves, our families, our friends, and to the causes we might have served. As it often is with physical wounds, so hurts of the heart, hurt pride and injured feelings can sooner be healed if we don’t nurse them too long, if we arew sooner up, and out, and active. Life goes on whether we go with it or not, and sitting aside in hurt silence is one unfortunate way of letting life waste away. We do ourselves damage by languishing too long in injured inactivity. Remember these words of an unidentified author: “In the very depths of your soul, dig a grave; Let it be as some forgotten spot to which no path leads; and there in the eternal silence bury the wrongs which you have suffered. Your heart will feel as if a load had fallen from it, and a divine peace will come to abide with you.”