Rearview Living

People are given to wondering what would have happened if they had done differently: what would have happened if they had turned the other corner; what would have happened if they had taken the other job; what would have happened if they had married the other man; what would have happened if they had seen the doctor sooner; what would have happened if they had chosen the other road. Of course, we can’t help wondering, but these are things we seldom know for certain. We can speculate as to the probabilities of what might have been, but seldom, if ever, could we definitely determine the full and ultimate consequences of the decisions we didn’t make, or of the things we didn’t do. Even if we could go back, and even if we did decide differently, we should still have cause to wonder⎯because almost every choice we make means passing up many other possible choices. No doubt all of us have some regrets and misgivings and no doubt all of us think at times how our decisions could have been wiser and now our lives could have been better. But one of the greatest wastes in the world is brooding upon the past. This doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t regret past errors. It doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t think how we would face a similar situation if we should meet with one again. Nor does it mean that we shouldn’t repent and improve upon the past. Surely we should and must. But those who gaze too much upon the past, those who think too much about what might have been, are running something of the same risk as the driver who keeps his eyes too much upon his rearview mirror and is inattentive to the road ahead. Experience is a great teacher. It is the road we have been over. But the wrecks in the rear aren’t the ones we are now trying to avoid. It’s the curves ahead that count now. Whatever mistakes that we have made, whatever debts we have incurred, whatever duties we have deferred, our only way out is ahead. This is life’s inflexible formula. What has been and might have been well serve as a warning⎯but what may yet be is our cause of first concern.