Slamming Doors…

If we were to title what follows in one phrase we could perhaps call it “Slamming doors.” But one things about slamming doors is this — that some of them don’t open again — or not very soon — sometimes not ever — at least nor for those who slam them. And it wouldn’t seem very wise to slam doors in anger or when emotionally upset. (And of course, at other times one simply wouldn’t slam them.) Most of us have difficult times, difficult problems, difficult decisions, difficult days. Sometimes people disappoint us.. Sometimes situations and circumstances disappoint us. Sometimes we find faithlessness, duplicity, dishonesty; sometimes sorrow. And few, if any, live their lives without some anger, and without saying some things they wish they hadn’t said. Few, if any, live their lives without doing some things too hastily, some things they wish they hadn’t done — without making some shortsighted decisions. In childhood we see those who hastily act in anger. And in the later years of life, we sometimes see symptoms of the same impetuous short sightedness, in different ways, in different degrees. Some small thing goes wrong (or even some large thing), and we may immediately act on impulse instead of on sober and mature consideration. Sometimes those who have a major misfortune, an accident or illness, or who have lost someone they love, make far-reaching decisions before emotions have had time to mature. They decide to sell, or to move, or to change something — perhaps to change the whole pattern and picture of life before some of the essential factors have come into clear focus. Sometimes men, feeling offended, feeling resentful, are hasty and shortsighted, and slam doors on their won happiness and highest opportunity — sometimes even everlastingly. No man is himself in acute sorrow. No man is himself in anger. No man is himself with feelings of offense. And decisions that will wait are safer with waiting — waiting for time to take over, for the dust to clear away, for tempers to cool, for perspectives to return, for the real issues to show themselves, for the real values to reappear, for judgment to emerge and mature. We should think seriously before we slam doors, before we burn bridges, before we saw off the limb on which we find ourselves sitting. Decisions in acute sorrow, decisions in anger, decisions under pressure, decisions that haven’t been thought through are less likely to be mature and safe decisions.