A Gentle, Kindly Communication

A gentle, kindly, open communication is one of the essential qualities for the day-to-day understanding of each other and for explaining many moods and avoiding many hurts. There is sometimes need for silence and sometimes need for talk, and both have their place and purpose.

Moreover, there are different kinds of silence: there is thoughtful silence; peaceful, understanding silence; there is moody silence and inconsiderate silence. There is also hurt silence the silence in which people harbor hurts in their hearts and brood about them, or imagine offenses, or make small things seem large in their own minds and fail to bring them out into the open.

Marriage is a sharing, a giving, of ourselves. And this means sharing and giving our thoughts, our minds, our moods, our hopes and dreams, our plans and purposes, in closest confidence. Those who are so closely associated and concerned, so closely and rightfully part of a partnership, need to know, to understand, to communicate and get through to each other. Small hurts, and large ones also, can often be avoided if there is understanding, and there can be understanding only if there is communication.

This does not necessarily mean loquacious communication, nor only talking about big things. There is wisdom and satisfaction and closeness of confidence in sharing small things also what happened during the day, the small successes, failures, hopes and feelings. And fears, too, may be softened by gentle, kindly communication.

In marriage there must be confidence and understanding also. These call for an open channel of communication, a two-way interchange of thoughts and feelings. Where things are harbored in the heart, with no adequate outlet, real or imagined, they may fester and build up pressure.

One of the essentials of safety and success in marriage is an open channel for quiet, confident, two-way talk frank when it needs to be, and honest; but always gentle, always understanding, always kindly and considerate a communication that is never cutting or unkind.