The Meaning of Discipline

One of the greatest blessings that can come into the life of any child or youth, or anyone else, is intelligent and constructive discipline⎯first the discipline of self, and second, as necessary, the patient, persuasive, discipline of others.

Said Thomas à Kempis: “He who is living without discipline is exposed to grievous ruin. … Who hath a harder battle to fight than he who striveth for self-mastery? And this should be our endeavor,” he added, “even to master self, and thus daily to grow stronger than self and go on unto perfection.”

“The first law that ever God gave to man,” Montaigne observed, “was a law of obedience….” This also parents must remember,⎯that they “must require just and reasonable things” if they would have obedience. “From orders which are improper, springs resistance which is not easily overcome.”

On the other hand, “… indulgence can do no good to children,” John Locke observed. “Their want of judgment makes them stand in need of restraint and discipline… the time must come when they will be past the rod and correction… therefore what is to sway and influence his life, must be… habits woven into the very principles of his nature….”

No one can have everything he wants; no one can do everything he wants, and this we all need to learn early in life. The earliest teaching is best, but any time is better than later.

“The best school of discipline,” said Samuel Smiles, “is home-family life is God’s own method of training the young….” It is the perennial and ever present duty of parents to counsel and discipline children with persuasive, quiet consistency⎯to teach self-control, obedience, respect for authority, respect for law, respect for people, respect for principles⎯preferably in a positive and not punitive sense.